


Precipice

by Cliophilyra



Category: Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types, Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Dialogue-Only, Inspired By Tumblr, M/M, Pining, Tony Stark Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-21
Updated: 2020-07-21
Packaged: 2021-03-04 19:01:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25431301
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cliophilyra/pseuds/Cliophilyra
Summary: Tony talks over his fear of hurting Steve with a friend.Based onTHISamazingly fitting piece of audio (from the film The Soloist). Seriously. Listen to it with your Stony ears on. It made my heart hurt a bit.
Relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Comments: 5
Kudos: 24





	Precipice

**Author's Note:**

> I just wrote this in about 20 mins so there may be errors! Please let me know if you spot any. I was so inspired by that little clip of audio that I basically had to do this on the spot. 
> 
> Sadly I can’t take credit for the first line - I stole it from the audio.
> 
> I don't know who Tony is speaking to - it could be several people. I would love to know who you think it is!
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
> I’m on Tumblr at [cliophilyra](https://cliophilyra.tumblr.com) Come and say hi! :)

“I don’t want him to love me. It's a bad idea. _I love you Tony_ turns into _You failed me Tony_ , turns into very bad things. That’s my limited experience. I don’t want to be on the other side of that with him, would you?”

“Does it have to go like that?”

“It’s not a question of has to, it’s a question of will. It will. It always does.”

“Doesn’t he deserve a say in this?”

“No. Because he doesn’t know, he doesn’t know how it goes but I do. I know so it’s up to me to save him, and me, from jumping off that cliff.”

“So why aren’t you telling him this?”

“I will, I just...I will.”

“He won’t understand.”

“Probably not.”

“He’ll be hurt.”

“Not as badly as he would be later.”

“You’d hurt him?”

“Not on purpose but yes. In the end.”

“How?”

“Don’t know yet. Maybe I’ll get too caught up in work, spend too much time in the lab? Risk my life too many times? Maybe I’ll forget his birthday? Get drunk and show him up? Cheat on him? Who knows – there’s plenty of options.”

“Hmm.”

“Told you.”

“I’m pretty sure the only one of those things that would even faze Steve would be you cheating on him and you know what, there is no fucking way you would do that.”

“How do you know? It wouldn’t be the first time.”

“Because it’s Steve.”

“No. You still don’t get it do you? I need to stop this now _because it’s Steve_. Because he is everything I have ever wanted and I am still going to fuck it up.”

“You’re afraid.”

“...”

“You’re afraid that if Steve loves you, if you let him love you or worse, if you let yourself love him. It won’t be enough to stop you self-sabotaging.”

“...”

“It might not be. It probably won’t be. That’s not how it works Tony. It’s not a case of find the right person and they’ll fix all your flaws. Those are for you to fix. Some people can help but they can’t do it for you. So you’re right, there’s nothing to say you won’t repeat old patterns again with Steve. You might both end up hurt.”

“Exactly.”

“But you might also get through it. You might actually start working on yourself and you might be ok and you might thrive and he might be the one to support you through all of it. I can’t think of anyone better for that job.”

“I can’t hurt him.”

“It’s too late for that Tony. End it now or in ten years time and it’ll hurt – he’s already invested and so are you. You're already on that precipice so you might as well jump with your eyes open and do what you need to do to make it fucking work.”

“I don’t know what to do.”

“So find out. I’ll give you a hint. The first step is to stop being a martyr, take off the fucking hair-shirt and let yourself have this chance. You’re good enough ok?”

“I’m not good enough for him.”

“He’s the only one who can decide that and he is so in love with you that it’s frankly embarrassing so...shut up.”

“You shut up.”

“Get out of here. Go find him and tell him. Tell him you love him, tell him you’re afraid. Tell him all the shit you just told me and go from there. Make whatever decisions you want – together – just don’t dress up your fears and pretend you’re doing him a favor.”

“I hate you.”

“I know.”


End file.
